Secondary school

I remembered last year, when I still had a life, when I went to school and the hours passed quickly, when I could disconnect from classes and still get very good marks, when I used to study a day before the exam and not failed, when my subconscious was quite, when I was stressed only in exams week, and it seems like another life.

Now, five minutes of class seem like two hours, I can't disconnect on any class because otherwise I will not understand nothing, I have to study at least two or three days before the exam, and if I am relaxing in my home and doing nothing on the couch, I have a voice in my head whispering ''you must to do that, and you must study...' And all this suffering to get a five.

We were all warned that secondary school was not easy, but I was kept thinking that it will not be such a big deal, but it's true that you don't know what that means until you live it. Most of the time we have exams, if it isn't a subject is the other, if we haven't exams we have to do homeworks, review what we had done in the class, or make a redaction. And all these works from ten subjects, and I'm not a robot, I'm only a human and I need to eat, to sleep, and have a free time. I'm not saying I don't have a life, but I only have the half I used to have and I'm very stressed.

And they keep saying ''This isn't ESO. You aren't forced to be here, you could go if that is what you want'', but all we know that is not true, somehow, we are forced to be there, because if you want to have a good quality of life you must to study and work hard, unless you are a millionaire or you get the lottery, which is quite unlikely. 

And there's the TDR too, threatening my summer. Summer is to disconnect and do nothing, only enjoy the good weather, the beach and the ice creams. I think it should be forbidden to study in the summer, but what I think is not important because I will have to do it anyway.

And I keep asking myself, if this is just secondary school, how will be the degree?
I'm not blaming anyone because I understand life is not easy and if you want something you must work hard to get to your proposals and goals, and I'm not a fast-surrendering person, so I will keep working and improving my marks.